卡在一個不上不下的階段 - 職涯
By Damian
at 2018-09-05T00:23
at 2018-09-05T00:23
Table of Contents
覺得自己的生活卡住了,從幾年前就幾乎沒什麼在動......
我很清楚自己比不少人會讀書,上課滑手機、考試直接裸考,
以前在明星高中女校裡,理科裸考常常比大多數努力準備的同學還高,
當初報名指考時,以為自己會讀書,結果躺在床上等考試日......
最後只有考前三個月唯一讀過的三上生物的記憶,其他全裸考了,
現在在的學校也是因為想著讀不到最想要那兩所自己感興趣的系,就直接讀當地大學有
那個科系的學校,
學校算是中上,但看到很多以前一起競爭或覺得我很強的朋友們都到國外名校或台大了,
就會覺得毫無努力的自己像個廢物......
現在也是期中期末考前一天凌晨才開始讀,然後拿個系前三。
我也清楚我的資質不上不下,不是那種超聰明幾乎不做任何努力就能成功的強者,
現在只是在虛耗時間和中上的資質,
但就是不知道為什麼卡住了,做什麼都沒太大動機,
我是屬於做了就會開始有興趣的人,不管讀什麼都覺得很有趣(也可能只是讀懂的成就感
但連這種感興趣也卡在不上不下的地步,
什麼都挺有趣,也沒有什麼能到燃起熱情超想去做,
就變成每次想著之後要去做,但都沒什麼鬥志所以最後都沒做。
最近越來越覺得自己浪費那麼多年,把自己變得越來越沒有內涵了,
有點像大家說的早慧,
以前自己覺得普通和理所當然的想法會被師長大力讚賞和被同儕推崇,
雖然現在也是屬於經常被同儕諮詢意見的人,
但大家都在成長,而且也逐漸感覺到他人變得成熟了,而自己還停留在原地。
已經不知道該怎麼辦了......
就算跟我說不努力怪誰或努力一定能做到這種話也沒用,
像這樣類似的話我自己也告誡自己逾百次了,
哪怕一點建議也好,大家有什麼建議嗎?QQ
快被虛無感淹沒了......
--
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職涯
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