請英文高手幫我改一下英文自我介紹 - 面試

By Frederic
at 2012-06-22T00:00

Table of Contents

下禮拜要去大學面試,餐飲管理系,希望各位能幫我修改或增加一些東西,使文法正確.通順
麻煩各位了!
my name is xxx i graduated from xxx hight school in xx
i'm an easygoing person
i not only like food and beveragebut also love serving the public
(我熱愛餐飲但我更喜歡服務大眾,這裡好怪)
so i hope i can enter your departmen to learn more prefessional knowledge and skills
became a professional person (成為專業的餐旅人才,這裡也很怪..)
this is my self introduction thank you for your listening
已更新項目:
so I hope I will have the chance to enter your department to learn more professional knowledge and skills
我想把這裡加上原因變成
<所以我希望能進入貴系,因為貴校有專業的師資.優良的設備使我能學習到更多專業知識與技巧讓我成為一個專業的餐旅人才>這樣要怎嚜改?
麻煩各位大師了=)

Tags: 面試

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By Regina
at 2012-06-26T22:25

修正如下，請參考。
My name is xxx, i graduated from xxx hight school in xx(本句因明顯再補充說明前句的人物，I 字可省略), I'm an easygoing person, I not only like very interested in(修詞) food and beverage, but also love serving the public（前句有一動詞interest，而依後句之文義,動詞也是interest, 故只須前面動詞，後句相同之動詞可省略） so I hope I can will have the chance to(修詞) enter your department to learn more professional knowledge and skills to became a professional person specialist in related field. Above is my self-introduction, thank you for your listening

By Emily
at 2012-06-26T17:21

my opinion:
My name is ____, and i graduated from _____ high school in _____.
I am an easygoing person.
I like food and beverage.
Serving the society was one of my dreams when i was small.
(was it? if it was, then you can use it.)
I hope i can enter your department to learn more skills and knowledge to become a professional person.
My self introduction is over, thank you for listening.

By Jacob
at 2012-06-26T14:31

Not only but also通常用在後者跟前者差異很大，且想要給人一些驚喜的時候
所以建議改成and also就好囉
to learn more prefessional knowledge and skills about food & travel so as to be/become a professional in this field.
professional本身就可當名詞用，不用加person
其他都很棒了吧

請英文高手幫我改一下英文自我介紹 - 面試

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